Study, prease.

Mmmkay. Can't help it but I've been so hooked to this video every day the past week. Such a good "time-to-take-a-break-from-studying-'slash'-feel-good" song. Maybe cause it's old school hehe. Any-hoo, all the best to all you hardworking ants. Don't forget to catch a breather once in a while yeh. Enjoy =)

P.s. Big cheers to Chris Law for helping me put up the banner links and everything else on both my blogs. Tell him how awesome he is if you think the blogs look great. Peace, guys =)

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Edit:

Today is not a day of bad luck, despite being Friday the 13th. To Write Love on Her Arms (TWLOHA) Day is a day of reminder that is Hope, amidst the darkness of the world for people battling with depression, suicidal attempts and addiction. It's a great cause, and just wait til you read about the powerful story behind how TWLOHA started.

"You were created to love and be loved." - Quote from the Mission Statement of TWLOHA.

http://www.twloha.com/vision/story/

Thanks for telling me about this great cause, Greg. You're one heck of a fella. Blessings, guys!

Jeez Lewizzz, it's the end of the season already!

Hello boys and girls,

So today after church, someone gave me one of the most meaningful gifts I have ever received.

Honestly, I was even more moved after reading it again when I got home. I cherish sentimental value. I like what people write on presents more than the actual present itself. Once again, I am even more of a Cheeseball than I thought. Ahh well. Whaddaya gonna do, right? Thanks, friend.

On a different note, Tim asked us to think about "What is it that you do" and "Why do you do what you do". Pfffffffft. First thought was, "Where do I even start? I guess I sorta know why I chose Engineering and why I like it. Errr..." I mean, at the point I just realised that I only had some ideas here and there but for some reason I just couldn't string them together to give one solid answer.

And my answer to these questions seemed to have shifted with time in the past as well. Which got me thinking if I even knew what the real answer was to begin with. Maybe I did once, but then I forgot, I'm not sure. Right now, sorta just doesn't cut it.

I thought I knew, but disappointingly, I don't think I actually do. It's a rather humbling position to be in, I must say. To be able to admit my own weaknesses to God and to allow Him to redefine my entire Life again.

I mean, the past semester, was like no other. Done things I wouldn't normally have done. Said things I wouldn't normally have said. And met people I wouldn't normally have met.

I want God. I need God. To reevaluate and judge every area of my Life. Starting with the course I'm studying, my part time work, commitment to Christian Union, Engineers Without Borders, Housechurch, everything. I really need to rethink if I can't even answer a simple question like, "Why am I doing Engineering?"

Cause I know damn well that I don't want to enter another season of my Life without having any Clarity whatsoever. NO. More thoughts on this to come.

Right now, it's going to be a very intensive next few weeks of exams preparations. I really want to get as much studying done cause one of my oldest/best friend from KK is visiting Melbourne for the first time TWO days before my first day of exams! With two papers to sit for that day too! GAHHHHH.

Praying that God will speak to you and me through this time. Hope you're all doing well, especially those sitting for exams.

Much Love,

Winston.

Why do I do this to myself?

Hello children,

Just wanted to run a quick update before I catch some zzzzz's. So I realise that it's really late, but I still insist on blogging even though I will regret this sorely tomorrow (I always do). Mainly cause I fell sick yesterday and barely slept cause kept waking up every 2 - 3 hrs ARGHH. I hate falling sick cause I feel so tired while in pain every waking moment. What sucks more is I can barely eat anything and I still had to drag myself to work cause couldn't find anyone to cover my shift.

Anyway I really should be getting some rest but I like staying up this late at night. Just cause there would be so much of things to do and places to go each day that I can't remember the last time I enjoyed some time alone. Unless it's at the end of a hectic day, late at night, like now. All the peace and quiet of the night all to myself. How incredibly nice. Hence the reason why I always insist on staying up late just so I can reconnect.

Right so just now I decided to update my iCal (Calendar on Mac) to organise my Dec '09 - Feb'10 summer holiday and this was the final product:-

All of which include trips to Brisbane/Gold Coast for 10 days, around Malaysia with uni friends for another 10 days and also Singapore with family for 4 days. Also, will be beginning my 3 week internship amidst all the festive seasons as well as catching up with old friends at Class Reunions! This summer is going to be EPIC. But no matter how awesome as awesome can get, the highlight of my holiday will definitely be my very own BROTHER'S WEDDING!!!!!!!

Gosh this is such an incredibly exciting time for our family. First marriage! First born! Eldest son! My brother that I love to bits is finally getting married to the love of his life! I'm so proud and happy for him you have no idea.

Lots to look forward to this summer. Unfortunately it's not time to have all that fun just yet. Gotta get through my crazy exams first! Anyway good luck to you all and hope that everyone is having a productive and disciplined exam preparation. Blessings!

Love,

Wince.

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Very quick snapshot of what happened the last two weeks before it was time to buckle down and study for exams:-

On the train back from a BBQ at Oakleigh. Great night. Deep and memorable conversations with Will, Anastasiya and Phil.

Enjoying nice coffee and brekkie with my boys at St Ali. Really provoking thoughts for the end of the year. Good stuff.

Lastly, first Halloween celebration with the EWB gang. FANTASTIC NIGHT. Can't wait to go nuts with the guys again after the conference in November!

Take care, wonderful people. Peace!!

Don't be Ri-DONK-ulous, son!

Hello boys and girls...

Ever felt yourself knees LITERALLY tremble uncontrollably, mouth stutter ridiculously while both hands and feet sweat profusely at the same time? If you do, then we have something to talk about. Cause this is exactly how I would feel every time I've been asked to speak in public. No joke.

I mean, seriously? I know that I'm not exactly the "shyest" person most of the time, but put me on the spot in front of a group of people and my demeanour instantly reduces to that of the tiniest and most timid person on Earth.

So we had a EWB meeting the other day, and our President, tried to get each person from each year to lecture bash our own classes to get the word out there about the EPIC EWB National Conference in November. So when he went around asking people, I literally looked down on the floor to avoid eye contact. And when he let me slide and didn't put me on the spot by asking, I really felt like I dodged a bullet, PHEW! Until later that afternoon, he sent me an e mail kindly asking if I would show the class the video and speak a few words about the conference, cause he's already e mailed the lecturer to expect us.

!@#$%^!@#$%^&*()!@#$%^&*()~!@#$%^&*()!@#$%^&*()!@#$%^&*()

Maybe it's cause I think of myself as still young and green in so many ways. Or maybe it was cause I saw my identity as a small little Asian in a big Western country. All excuses, nonetheless. Whatever it was, I finally caved and said a long prayer after much intrinsic warfare. And all I prayed was that God may use me to really speak into my fellow colleagues and to open up their eyes to see a specific PURPOSE in what they're currently studying and striving to be.

Ironic thing is, I can be passionate to talk to anyone about what we do if they asked, but for some reason I've always felt shy about talking to my course mates about it too, even the closest ones. Just cause I know that these friends would be the ones who might actually take it seriously, but I'm just worried that I might fail and leave a very bland and indifferent first impression. So yeah, lots at stake for these people that I see so much potential in, and I guess that's what's stopped me before even though I really think that it will give each of them the BEST experience they could ever ask for in their entire Student Life.

With all that anxiety towards my own friends, let alone to my ENTIRE class (?!?!?!), and with people that I actually know and might be shocked to see me up there hence leaving me to feel slightly embarrassed about the whole idea, how could I POSSIBLY do this?! Before I go on, I feel so extremely blessed to have this ONE friend who completely relates to me in every way imaginable, that I can always talk to about this specific topic to feel supported and to support in return.

Anyway, what happened was I spent the entire night thinking carefully about what I believed about this club, cautiously picking out my words while praying the whole time to keep my head straight and clear. And cause I was taking this very seriously, and know how much confidence I lacked, I am shameless to admit that I even began recording myself just to see what I'm like when I'm nervous from a different point of view.

And all I can say is, OH... MY... DOG. My first thought was, "Is that really ME?! Do I really sound this ri-DONK-ulous?!?! This is bloody insane!! No one's gonna wanna hear me speak if I keep talking like this." Man, what a wake up call. Not to sound too full of myself, but I've ALWAYS believed that God is raising me up to be a Leader for Him some day. And a Leader not according to the world's standards, but His and His alone.

Another reason why I believe this, is cause I did ask a friend how he would feel, before the lecture, if he were me. And his immediate response was, "Sorry, but I know that I will NEVER do anything to put myself in your position." And it hit me really hard for the first time what it means to Take the Land. Cause if every one just wants to leave it to others, and no one wants to Rise up to do it, WHO WILL? What have WE, as His Creation been reduced to??

So last night was the first time I realised how FAR I was from that. And this was serious, because I know that my Calling was never to be a wallpaper but someone who shines brightly for God.

So after a long night, I went to sleep thinking I've made "a bit" of progress on my part, by learning how to control my nerves better and to practice how to convey a message more efficiently.

And sure enough, I woke up this morning two hours before with this incredible sense of calmness which I could not explain but knew that I had every reason to thank God for. But naturally, I was still slightly nervous while waiting outside the lecture hall, albeit more composed than I normally would be.

So, finally... WENT IN, talked to the lecturers, showed them the video, and TOOK THE PLUNGE.

Thinking back, I wasn't really sure what happened cause I didn't allow my mind to process anything cause the only thing I wanted was for the Spirit to take me to "go with the flow". Which, I guess, was what happened. Cause funny thing is, even though I spent so long preparing for what to say in that moment, I ended up barely using any of mental notes anyway! Which was shocking cause I was so prepared to say what I had planned to say. But once again, the Spirit proved that She is not a fan of us relying on our own strengths. But on Hers. In that moment. Spontaneously. And She would't have it any other way.

FOAHHHHHH. After receiving what my Asian modesty would only allow me to describe, as nothing more than an "obligatory" applause, I walked back to my seat feeling on TOP of the World. Even though I had NO idea "how I did", but I felt extremely moved by the Spirit's unexpected intervention. I left everything I had and believed in up there in front of the class and that was more than good enough for me.

But me being me, I made a friend promise to be as critical as he could be about how I'd speak before the lecture so I could get constructive feedback to improve in the future. But coming from him, he said I did really well, and couldn't find a trace of nervousness from my speech. And turns out this was the general consensus among my other uni friends as I asked around afterwards. Again, my Asian modesty tells me that they're only being nice =).

But what really made it all worth it, was the two people that came up to ask me more about EWB and I could tell their interest was genuine, and I couldn't ask for anything more. And I am glad to say that even some of my friends are now extremely keen on the idea. What a great icing on the cake!

So, yeah. HUGE day for me, personally and especially, Spiritually. Today, I felt like I've grown a bit taller in Christ and I'm just so overwhelmed by my Father's Love. Though to most people, it might have been an insignificant 2 minutes of sharing, but to me it's one of the BEST things I have ever done for Christ. Cause today, hopefully it wasn't me, but it was GOD who had a moment of Glory back in that lecture hall.

And there's just a few major lessons that I've learned from today that I'd like to note down so I can look back on some day:-

(i) Just like friggin' bungy jumping, DON'T let your mind THINK even as you're at the edge of the board, but just JUMP and take that Leap of Faith to the Unknown. Cause I've learned that NOTHING that the Spirit calls us to do is ever "bad".

(ii) I have been forcefully humbled today cause even though I was crapping-my-pants-scared, I held on to this ONE thing that I thought could give me a bit more confidence. But turns out that I was so wrong because even though I had that stripped away, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined cause I quickly found myself relying on No One else but God which made it more than okay.

(iii) My identity lies not in my physical appearance or position, but it can ONLY and will ONLY be formed in Christ Alone!!

And these lessons are like prized jewels to me, so precious and rewarding. So valuable to me as it is what I have acquired and God-given from my Life's lessons and experiences, which gives me even more of a reason to share and be reused by God.

I guess this is what you get for choosing a Life of Faith, having completely NO SAY whatsoever in where you want to be and what you want to do in God's plan for our lives. And this will never change. But thankfully, we can't ask for a better Creator to rule over us with that much power, can we? Cause WHO ELSE could do a better job?

Hope you're all well. Thanks for hearing me out.

Love,

Winston.

Whoaaa So Soon?

Hrmm. Had a good chat with our spiritual "Dad" today. It's so easy to forget how approachable He is. Literally like an "imaginary friend", but more real than you could ever imagine.

So today, my eyes was widely opened to the Spirit's work, not in my Life, but all around. And let me just say this, She is BUSY AS. And it's great. Really, great.

In a lot of ways, it gave me a chance to reassess my Life. Where I am, Where I've come from and Where I'm going. But today, God told me that it wasn't enough. That planting myself in "The World" is not enough. He has greater plans to use my "position" for the next phase of his Kingdom Project. The Spirit is mobilising fast within the system and His Hands are at work everywhere I look.

Now, I just pray for courage and faith to believe in God's plan through us. To not doubt and fear the outcome of what my mind can only perceive, but to dare to RISE UP to a Higher Calling that is awaiting each of us. All plans have been made. And each day they are falling into place piece by piece, til the final piece of God's humanity is restored. One sweet day, in Resurrection.

So today, I challenge you to think about how God used you the past 6 months, and more importantly, what He is doing through you NOW. It's not obvious sometimes cause His actions don't seem to be "drastic" enough, but He was there. In so many ways, you were bearing His image. When you felt down, but your spirits lifted high again, God was with you. When you had a great time sharing a simple meal with your friends, God was with you. When a happy thought about your future came to mind, God was with you. And God has been doing SO much in our lives the past few months and often go unacknowledged.

And He doesn't "choose" who to Love. No. You are as much a part of Him, as He is of you, whether you are a "believer" or not. So let's take this time to give Him praise, shall we?

God is Good. Hope you're all well, especially as the time of madness is fast approaching.

Much Love,

Winston.

Thanks for your time

Hellooooo, beautiful people...

It's me, the one and only, yours truly, Winston... (Geez, Wince... Narcissistic, much?) Anyway I know it's been a long time but I've just had so much trouble to find time to blog. Which completely sucks cause there's so much that happened and SO many thoughts the past 2 weeks that I really wanted to pen down. But... just... couldn't find the time.

I guess it's cause I wanted to get all these things out of the way before I sat down to recollect my thoughts but as you know it. Damn uni work. Just like cockroaches, you kill one and hundreds of the like scramble in to take its place. That's why even though I really should be sleeping, especially after the day I've had, I've decided not to put it off any longer despite the time and fatigue.

So one of the things that I've come to realise the past 2 weeks, is that I am enrolled in a really awesome course. Engineering. I don't mean to put any other courses down, but this is what I personally think of Engineering. Anyway, turns out Engineering makes everyone popular. It's not us, it's the course. EVERYONE has got so many friends. I know you've heard me say this before, but every Eng lecture is like a party, with our circle of friends getting bigger and bigger.

It's really great to see that it really doesn't take long to get along really well with people from completely different background/race/religion, whatever. And you see it from the dynamics of our group when everyone is just talking to everyone like good old buds. Cause of that, I find my uni life extremely enjoyable. Mainly due to the fact that I know that all these people that I've come to know the past year, will continue to be my lifelong friends in the future. Every single one of them. And I can't wait to keep journeying with all these wonderful people for the next few years.

Anyway, good times good times... But one thought that really stuck with me the past few weeks is what Tim said about how it is IMPOSSIBLE to find God by looking in the past or our future, because God IS right here, right NOW, in the present. And that's the only place God is, i.e. with us as I'm typing and you're reading this post. And every time I stop to think, his PRESENCE just hits really hard. And let me tell you something, NOTHING gives me more sense of security, comfort and strength than that thought.

Man... If it weren't for that, I don't think I would have made it through anything. Cause I don't mean to complain, but turns out things have been getting a lot more hectic than it already is. I'm constantly burned out but at the same time, I feel God is really teaching me the importance of being SELFLESS. Laying down my Life* for people, which is MUCH more work than I imagined. But no matter, I rest on the fact that GOD IS WITH ME. And I know that this is Him answering my prayers, to be OUT there and be used in every way possible.

Which brings me to this joke that has been replaying in my head from How I Met Your Mother (AWESOME SHOW). Anyway, Barney had to volunteer at this soup kitchen, only that he went in as a shockingly "spiritual", nice and cheery person. And when Ted and Robin was surprised to find him there, they asked him, "What are you doing here?!" All he said was, "The Lord's work =D". Which was obviously a joke cause it came from Barney, of all people! Lolll something about that scene just cracked me up for days. Til today as I was walking to work, it hit me that if anyone were to ask me that question, I really wanted to be able to give that same answer! Not rhetorically, DUHHH... But yeah, something to think about. And this coming from BARNEY on How I Met Your Mother. WHO WOULD'VE THUNK IT?!

Okok on a different note, I read this incredible CHEEEEESY and so utterly fake e-mail the other day. But what surprised me was how MOVED I was by it! Arghhh!! All the Mozarella, Parmesan and Cheddar... Anyway was a story about how an old lonely man died and gave the young neighbour kid who came by a coupla times to help the guy out an extremely precious gift in his will. And attached to the gift was a note saying, "Thanks for your time". OMGOMGOMG usually something like this would seriously repulse me but I was deeply moved by it, D'oh!!

And I feel that way cause I can really relate to the old man. How I felt so grateful for little conversations and time I shared (albeit not doing anything particularly significant then) with all the people who have "come and gone" in my lifetime. I mean, my friends and family know that I love them, but here's to all the people that I didn't get a chance to thank!!

The guy on the park bench, the customer at work, the lady outside union house, the security guard and cleaner in my building, the drunkard on the streets, the waitresses at restaurants, and so many more! I still think about most of these people til this day.

And all I wanna say to each of them is, Thanks for your time.

Much Love,

Winston.

P.s. Who says everyday can't be the highlight of your week!

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Hrmmm... Brief summary of what's been happening the past month. There's heaps more that I had to leave out cause... Oh well.

Went to Mornington for fishing. Outstanding weather. Oh oh and I caught this starfish less than a minute after I started! WOOT!! Too bad this and few other starfishies were my only catch of the day ;(

Lunch on the pier with the bunch. Awesome day together. Had KUNYIT battered fish n chips for lunch. Dodgyyyy @_@. JK =)

Celebrated Mooncake Festival with the whole gang that night. Enjoying one of our favourite cuisines, Szechuan food!!! Reason we love it is because Szechuan meals have been one of our best eating experiences together lol. Like a tradition for us KK peeps now. And the restaurant actually gave us complimentary mooncakes that night! Fantastic service, that place.

Went to Carlton Gardens to have some old fashion traditional fun with Lanterns to celebrate Mooncake Festival! Had such a great time with these lovely peeps.

And no Mooncake Festival celebration is complete without Mooncake which my dear old Dad brought all the way from KK! Thanks Mum and Dad, they tasted great and we all LOVED it! Great times eating mooncake with our lanterns under the moonlight during Mooncake Festival in Melbourne. Love you guys!

Went to see a friend perform with in a choir with the Melbourne Philharmonic Orchestra. Good experience.

Great time and FOOD at dinner with the guys after the concert. Too bad Calvin and Guang couldn't join us.

Ryan recently decided to give cooking a go. So we went over to Ryan's place to teach him a few simple dishes he could try cooking. Jap curry, stir fry choy sum, and onion omelette. Simple but still good.

Celebrated Sam's 20th birthday at the Brighton Jap Buffet. Great meal with the bunch. When I found out we were going there, I was ecstatic! Cause since the first time I ate there, I really really wanted to go back cause I loved the food so much but just couldn't cause I didn't have a car! Arghh... Oh how I wish I could have a car here one day...

The people who came to celebrate the Life of someone dear to each of us

Hope you had a great time that night cause we sure did!! Thanks Winnie for organizing it all!

Celebrated Jade's birthday at Sante at Crown. This is a picture of people that make my day at uni. I like this photo cause you could see the city lights at the back. Hope you enjoyed yourself that night, Jade!

Awesome bunch of ppl! And this wasn't all. I think 5 - 6 had to leave before we could cut the cake =/. Had so many good laughs with them that night. Anyway always great spending time with uni mates outside uni. Engineering FTW!!

Later, we the city kids decided we would play some pool before heading home. How we always love to end the night. Just like we did on Ken's bday (one of many photos omitted just so my blog doesn't use up all your bandwidth =/)

Went to Footscary... Sry, I meant Footscray market!! GOSH I love Footscray so much!!! Dodgy dodgy dodgyyyy =D... Anyway, grabbing stuff to cook Laksa and Fried Meehoon for approx 40 ppl in my small apartment kitchen.

So much work but we managed! HAH!! All I know is there was sooooooo... muuuuuch... FOOOOD! Don't know if everyone like it cause I wasn't there. Had to rush to work after that =(

Anyway, all the best to everyone who's prepping for the exams!!! PEACE!

A New Beginning

Today, God performed not one, but TWO Miracles and Breakthroughs in my Life.

I am so grateful because I haven't been able to sleep well the past week. So many nights of tossing and turning. Too much unrest the past few months.

But tonight, I reckon I'll have one heck of a good night's rest. Just cause I haven't felt this much at peace in a long time. And today, I am reminded again that EVERYTHING happens in God's timing. Praise the Lord. In the meantime, don't lose hope, son.

Anyway, tomorrow is a brand spanking new day. And I'm looking forward to every waking moment of it. Peace y'all.

Love,

Winceeee.